I’m writing here a useful guide
For those who’ve never taught,
To help you understand the terms
Used in a school report.
Teachers are most careful when
They write the terms events;
They’re honest but they’re careful,
So as not to give offence.
A “lively” child is often one
You peel off from the wall.
To call him bad or even mad
Just wouldn’t do at all.
Lacking motivation is a
Coded way of saying
He doesn’t lift a finger but
Likes gossiping and playing.
A child that’s lacking social skills
In terms both straight and crude
Is one who snatches what he wants
In fact, he’s bloody rude.
Lacking presentation skills is
Nothing more nor less
Than saying his work’s unreadable
It’s all a scruffy mess.
So when you open his report
Please stay that generous hand
Top of his class or sat on his arse?
Make sure you understand.
Steve Blakesley © June 2002
Taid of Life 